Showing posts with label Doctor Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Doctor Jokes. Show all posts

Doctor aur Bhagwan ko kabhi Naraz nahi krna chahiye

Bhagwan & Doctor ko kabhi
naraj nahi karna chahiye...
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Bhagwan naraj, aap doctor ke
pass
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aur
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Doctor naraj, to aap bhagwan ke
pass...

Doctor apni Parchi mein kya likhte

Ek admi Doctor se :- Aap Parchi Me Aisa
Kya Likhte Ho.
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jo Sirf Medical Store Wale Ko Hi Samajh Me aata hai
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Doctor :- main likhta hun….
“Maine Loot Liya Hai, Ab Tu Bhi Loot Le..”

Comforting before Operation

A man was wheeling himself frantically down the hall of the hospital in his wheelchair, just before his operation.

A nurse stopped him and asked, "What's the matter?"

He said, "I heard the nurse say, It's a very simple operation, don't worry. I'm sure it will be all right."

"She was just trying to comfort you. What's so frightening about that?"

"She wasn't talking to me. She was talking to the doctor!"

Funny Medical Definations

Have you heard of Pappu applying to a medical school to become a doctor? Needless to say he never made it. You know why?  These are the answers he wrote in his entrance exam.

Antibody – Against everyone

Artery – The study of the paintings.

Bacteria – Back door to a cafeteria.

Caesarean section – A district in Rome.

Cardiology – Advance study of poker playing.

Cat scan – Searching for lost kitty.

Mein chitragupt hun !!

Operation k bad patient bola:
"doctor saheb Kya ab me ROG MUKT hu..?"
Samne se Jawab mila:
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"Beta, doctor saheb to niche
reh gye,
me to CHITRAGUPT hun.

Doctor got Heart Attack after reading a book's Title


At an Chandigarh Railway Station, An American Doctor got Heart attack after reading a Book's
Name..!!

Guess the name of that book??


Book name was

"How to Become a DOCTOR in 30 Days". Rs 150/-

Punjabi woman to Doctor

A punjabi woman talking in English to a Dr. about sick child.

"My kaka is ill ek week da. Na eat da, na sleep da, bas weep da te cheek da, nalay nak v leak da.

Docter vs Student

Doctors after operation and students after examz.
BOTH tell the same thing
WE TRIED OUR BEST
CAN't SAY ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
AB SAB UPPERWALE K HATH ME HAI;
so ab hum prayer hi kar sakte hai

English Translation of Last Two lines :
Everything is in the Hands of God;
We only can do is What, A Prayer

Welcome to the Heaven

A doctor, an engineer, and a fungal taxonomist arrived at The Pearly Gates.
The doctor said how he'd healed the sick, helped the lame; but he was a sinner and was sent to Hell.

The engineer told how he'd built homes for the homeless, etc.; but he messed up the environment, so he was sent to Hell.

The fungal taxonomist was frightened by all this, but as soon as he mentioned his occupation, God said "You've already been thru Hell, Welcome to Heaven."

Mistakes

In Real Life !!!!
If a barber makes a mistake,

It’s a new style...

If a driver makes a mistake...... 



In Real Life !!!!
If a barber makes a mistake,

It’s a new style...

If a driver makes a mistake,

It is an accident...

If a doctor makes a mistake,

It’s an operation...

If a engineer makes a mistake,

It is a new venture...

If parents makes a mistake,

It is a new generation...

If a politician makes a mistake,

It is a new law...

If a scientist makes a mistake,

It is a new invention...

If a tailor makes a mistake,

It is a new fashion...

If a teacher makes a mistake ,

It is a new theory...

If our boss makes a mistake,

It is our mistake......

If an employee makes a mistake,

It is a "MISTAKE!!!"

Dentist took my teeth

Buttasing: Yaar Yesterday i want doctor’s clinic beacause of teeth pain
Gurubachan: Oh ya how is your teeth pain now?

Buttasing: I don’t know beacause doctor took my teeth with him.

Doctor's Advice to all Ladies

Babita goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue.

Doctor, "What happened?"

Babita: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp."

Doctor, "I have a real good medicine against that. When your husband comes home drunk, just take a glass of chamomile tea and start gargling with it. Just gargle and gargle"

Two weeks later she comes back to the doctor and looks reborn and fresh again.

Babita "Doctor, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk I gargled repeatedly with chamomile tea and he never touched me."

Doctor, "You see, how keeping your mouth shut helps!!!"

bhet swikar kijiye


Nayi(new) doctor ne apni life ka pehla operation kiya! Operation ki thodi der baad himarij mar gaya!
Marij ke marne ke baad doctor ne diwar par tangi bhagwan ki taswir ki ore haath jodkar sir jhukate hue puri shradha ke saath kaha: Hey prabhu meri ore se yeh pehli bhet swikar kijiye!