Most STUPID questions people usually ask in obvious situation

1. At movies: hey! Wt r u doing here?
... ...
Me: I sell tickets in black here. Don't
u know?
...

2. In bus:A fat lady steps on my feet:
Sorry did that hurt?

Me: No not at all. I'm on local
anesthesia . y don u try again?:O

3. When i got woken up at midnight
by a call: sorry! Were u sleeping?

Me: Na! I was doing research on
whether monkeys in Africa marry or
not. U thought i was sleeping,u
stupid fool?

4. when they c me with shorter hair:
hey Have u had a haircut?

Me: Nah! Its autumn. my hairs
shedding.!

5. When sm1 call on land-line n asks
where r u?

Me: M in market with telephone
around my neck